to be updated along the top, after the share button..1
🔥Suscipe Sancte Pater.. Receive, O holy Father, almighty and eternal God..
.. this page is for random musings, caveats & disclaimers before actually writing, notes on the process of actually putting together the rest of my reflections on Therese & Story of a Soul which can be found here. Think of it as Notebook or thinking space.
May it please God to do with my mind, heart, & soul what He wishes. May I love Him through my writing & love my neighbor with Christ’s Divine Love since I’m so poor at doing it, Amen.
Wed, Jul 28
🔥
It’s late, but there’s something I’m very happily remembering about how I said I would think about St. Therese tonight..
I was distraught on July 16 when Pope Francis’ Motu Propio came out, and then Therese appeared. I said I would read her to see how she wanted me to handle my approach to the Church.. to holiness, to sanctity, to simplicity, to Love and whatever and everything that entails. It’s difficult when there’s so much to think about, when so much gets in the way of what we really should be doing. I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about how to unveil my thinking about Therese on this substack that I forgot to hold true to 1) reading Therese 2) meditating & praying on her words, the Gospel she so loved, and Jesus, whom she loved more than anything, and 3) applying Therese’s truths, God’s Truth, to my own life, to direct me in what I should do.
Take St. Michael, for example. When He surveyed Lucifer’s rejection of God, he quickly used God’s power to carry what what God ordained from His Throne. He cast out the devil and the bad angels without a second thought. He didn’t sit and muse, wonder and laud in prayer.. St. Michael acts with the fervor that was granted him by God immediately. o, how blessed is the joyous discovery of God’s Will, pure & undisturbed when immediately acted upon, exactly what it was for Therese when she was instructed to write.
I need to do the same with St. Therese: take what God tells me through her, turn & layer it into my love, my vocation, and work for my Church. They may very well mean simple prayer, not necessarily writing all the time (Lord, help me!)
It’s just that her writing is so rich, I tend to get lost without going very far, too. Lord, help me!
Let us apply this principle then:
What I’ve noticed about Therese’s Daily Life:
— Therese speaks holy and loves intently, leading a pious life among her family & her community. She discovers & lives her vocation completely for the good of the Church unto death. This includes becoming a Carmelite, living a life of prayer, praying specifically for missions, being close to her sisters and her community, forming her soul completely in poverty — abandonment, that she may receive All. This is St. John of the Cross.
What I must do:
— I must do the same. If I pay too much attention to the Liturgical Wars, I must return & speak joyfully about what has especially drawn my attention these months — the Gospel, the Eternal Father, the Holy Mass — to my family & community. I can’t just speak of them though.. I must go deeper as I know Therese does. I must connect these to our deeper spiritual lives, to Christ’s sacrifice, to His Love for our souls. I must also shed unnecessaries and become even more simple — 360.
11p
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🔥
Well, I finally finished On Holy Writing - Therese's pathway in becoming a saint, which I started perhaps two days ago, maybe three. Imagine a big ole *sigh* emanating from me.. I don’t think I really got to say what I really want to really say.
Why not?
Well.. let’s see:
1: I’m writing to a general audience and not to my dearest friend whom I generally write little spiritual sentiments like these to/in front of/for. It’s different not having the person I usually visualize front and center as I write. They appeared somewhere along the end, but.. What to do about this?
2: Like what it is I *(mean* I demonstrate through Therese, the writing will just get better as time progresses.. the more I write about her, the easier it will all come. ..the more intimate I become with Therese, abandon, and forget about everything else, the more pure, truthful, and focused the writing will be.
3: I need to find my voice in Therese, my rhythm. Reading-writing turn-around needs to be established. I want to be immersed in her, I need to really get started & continue. Draw you in with me as I journey into her mind, her soul, her heart, back and forth into mine. Short bursts like this help, see, because I’ve just emerged from having been with her, musing on her, meditating with her, loving her in Christ. Maybe that’s what I need to do.
That’s what I hope anyway. Like Therese, I experience God & find my best expression of His Love through writing, through the Church’s liturgy, through the saints, even creating my own. May we all find a way to Magnify Him, may my piddly writing do so some day.
Love you.
❤️
8p
Mon, Jul 26
.. return from trip
I’m a little timid to officially-officially start.. it’s not out of fear of what Therese may demand of me, of what God may demand of me through her.. it’s not out of fear of reception of whatever writing or thinking or praying.. of whatever holy responses required of me. My hesitancy comes from finishing.
Once I get into this, I’ll be writing & pouring out my little soul onto these pages — I will be wringing myself out, my soul a soaked linen sheet left out in the holy rain. And that will require time and effort.. my wish is for every inkling & inspiration.
But.. I’m in the midst of living life. Being a secular Carmelite, a Daughter of the Church, a wife & mother who still raises children. You see..
So.. anyway. Let’s put on my reality hat: this just means the pointless in my life will have to be put on the wayside.
Good. Mary, my Mother, I place all this in your hands, Amen.
❤️
12 noon
Wed, Jul 21
.. it begins here..
I know I shouldn’t be too nervous about this, but I’ve a deadline — prayer and sleep before leaving for a short birthday hiatus over the weekend — and I haven’t written publicly in awhile. You’ll have to forgive me for what may not appear clear. I really, really want to get this in before I go..
My mutual Nick — @cathdad4, faithful husband & father on Twitter — began reading Therese’s Story of a Soul today, and after reading her quote on simplicity on the first page —
After reading her quote on simplicity on the first page, I couldn’t resist answering by reading along through this substack.
God’s given me the grace to remain settled after Pope Francis’ Motu Proprio Traditionis Custodes (Guardians of the Traditions) and the accompanying letter to our bishops. I am a faithful wife and mother of 5 chlidren, and we attend the Traditional Latin Mass. We have also served the Ordinary Form of the Roman Rite Mass at our local parish. Our TLM doesn’t appear to be in jeopardy, but the winds of change finally hit their peak with me this morning, even though the discourse on social media was pretty mild. Most American bishops have sent out letters keeping the status quo until further discernment, which is good news. Online discourse and heated rhetoric has calmed down, but on the homefront, my children are concerned for their friends and aren’t sure what to say., even though we’ve settled into the same rhythm of following God’s lead through whatever doors He keeps open for us.
I was a mess today.
I wanted to write to reassure young people who feel like cast-offs from all sides. I wanted to love those despairing and having a typically bad day in their lives beyond this Churchy drama. I wanted to continue taking care of my family & my own personal writing & projects & keep in touch with personal friends. I wanted to pray and find Jesus peace.
I entered prayer knowing I was thoroughly confused as to what to do to help my poor Mother Church — my fellow Catholics.
Enter Nick and St. Therese.
Therese
My husband and I are secular Carmelites, the “Definitive” type, which means for the past 10 years or so, we’ve gone through the entire formation process that binds us as Tertiaries to the Discalced Carmelite Order. We’ve read all of the writings of St. John of the Cross, St. Teresa de Jesus, and St. Therese.. We’re relatively proficient in mental prayer, getting there with contemplation (really, social media is what keeps me, if you must know). We know how to pray the Divine Office, aka the Liturgy of the Office. We’ve professed our vows and Final Promises to live the evangelical counsels of Obedience, Chastity, & Obedience. We really are aiming in perfection in our attempts in climbing Mt. Carmel daily. Why? Well, that’s another post, but the short of it is because we’re raising saints. There’s no better way to do this that work hard daily at becoming one.
The Truth is, we’re simply living a very Catholic life — a life any Catholic and should live, one immersed in prayer to survive this hellish world. We need a prayer life, obviously, but one that progresses deeper into mental prayer. It’s so hard to fight the good fight without it (see what St. Alphonsus Ligouri has to say on why we need mental prayer.)
Anyway, when I say Therese is my sister, she really is my sister.. I know how she thinks as a Carmelite, from one little Carmelite to another. This is how I regard her, I’m very close to her.
And like we do for all family members now and again (maybe it’s just me), I forgot all about her this past weekend since Traditionis Custodes. I thought about her a few days ago, for sure. A few days will pass between glances and muses to my sister, just like a few days will pass between phone calls back home, but in the midst of this Liturgy crisis, she completely skipped my mind. No doubt, Therese wants to entrance to remind me of how huge an impact she has in my life.. so here we go.
Some caveats:
- Reading & writing. What I’ll be doing is reading Story of a Soul and reflecting on whatever stands out to me in regards to:
- My focus. Therese is a Missionary of the Church and fought her own spiritual battles, within and without: within her soul & during World War I when she was invoked by countless French soldiers for protection. I want her to show me how to persevere as she did. I want to know how my crosses and my sorrow for my Church are like hers and how she addressed them. I want listen at her feet as she speaks to me and prompts me with questions for me to answer on how I can be an obedient daughter of the Church. I want her instruction on how to be saint in this forsaken world we’re living in. I simply want to know what she has to say about my concerns. She knows them all.
- My system. Little bubblings will go here. Posts — what I call “substacks” (yes, individual posts, not just this Capriccio website or substack, I’m sorry, I’ve verbed and nouned the thing) — will be published as frequently as possible. I am thinking 2-3 posts M-F, once during the weekend. I live a life, so I can’t guarantee a pacing. But I *do* invite you to come along with me. I am a slow reader and an even slower meditator-er and prayer-er, but I write pretty quickly and fluently, and tend to pray and think as I write. I also tend to live-write in public, which means I actively start a substack and update as I go along. I tend to do this for a special, secret reason. Yes, I have a lot of little tendencies. Some who’ve read my work, know what they are — to them, I dedicate Capriccio, this substack. I could not speak to you now if it weren’t for them. (I love you!🔥)
- My intention. Therese is going to help my interior life during these Liturgy Wars. I have to read her work. I will be reading her work to keep me grounded. I’m not a theologian, I am not a priest. Capriccio does not have a nihil obstat nor an imprimatur. All I have is my God in my heart, the Communion of Saints, and those I choose to keep very close to me to help guide me on my path to sainthood. Therese wants me now. She wants to help me survive this now. I am going to stay close to her while I go through what feels like death in my Holy Mother Church.
She suffered an agony we can’t imagine, one so many of us can possibly equate to our own crisis of Faith. The Great Apostasy we sense on the horizon may be similar to what Therese felt the eve of her impending death.. before the moment of her personal, particular judgement, before she could be assured of her own salvation. Obviously, it’s not quite the same, Therese suffered an agony we can’t imagine. But, as little brothers and sisters, I know there’s guidance Therese wants to offer us now as we venture into a territory never known by any faithful Catholic. We’re all missionaries now. Who better to turn to than St. Therese, the Church’s Patroness of Missions?
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Non nobis, Domine, non nobis, sed nomini tuo da gloriam, 7.21.2021
in Love,
veronica